Dearest Adelaide,
As parents we all want to do as well or better than our parents parented us. We hope to help our kids avoid some of the major heart aches, the stream of bad decisions, and the awkward mishaps. At the same time we know you are living your life, so all of the above will happen, but we just hope to have a bit more control over it.
The fact is we want you to be brave, but how we learned bravery may or may not be the way we want to pass it onto you. Thus we may or may not give you similar life experiences of our childhood. Sometimes if we haven't thought through or walked through our own childhoods we won't be able to recognize how we gained certain traits. So we haphazardly react similar situations, relationships and circumstances in hopes to teach you to be brave as we are now. Sometimes we adopt blindly the way our own parents, or grandparents parented us and throw it on you. Rather than asking was that good, how will this individual respond. We just morph the past onto the present without much understanding.
To be honest Adelaide, as you are first (and only right now), you've experienced a hodgepodge of mistakes, of blind adaptation, and quick fixes. You weren't planned to your father and I, so I never read a book. (and let's be honest those blogs and newsletters I got via email were less than helpful most of the time.) I see now the many things I'd do differently, truly the list is long though almost entirely superficial in nature. Your heart is good, and you are so young still my daughter of five, or six in a mere 15 weeks. You can and will grow so much more. I hope I can be found a faithful steward of the precious gift yiu are to us for now. You are not ours to keep, but to care for and love and I hope to do it right.
It's late, but I wanted you to know where I was at as a patent, but know that I'm proud of you, I love you and keep remembering "have a posture of humility" but be strong and courteous my darling.
Love you,
Moma
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